Friends with benefits

[vgqn]

So magscanner and I were watching a Nova episode the other night about apes. The narrator explained that bonobos are a particularly social group of apes, that everyone in a bonobo troop are "friends with benefits," then went on to describe the results of a cooperative behavior study with bonobos.

I was astonished to hear the phrase 'friends with benefits' in this context! I don't think of Nova as being coy about sex normally. All we can guess is that they used the euphemism so the episode could be shown to younger audiences.

But I wonder too how widespread the phrase 'friends with benefits' is. How much of their audience will know what it implies? My vague impression is that most people under 35 would know what it means, but that a lot of people over 50 won't have heard it.

EDIT: I realize many of us have heard the phrase and aren't under 35. But we also hang with crowds where we're likely to hear newish slang like that. I'm imagining some over 50 demographic that's not us. I'm sure my dad wouldn't know what to make of it, for instance. Although perhaps anyone with teenage/young adult kids has heard it, so maybe it's more prevalent than I think.

Comments

[kicking-k.livejournal.com]

I like "friends with benefits" much better than the most common UK term, which is "fuckbuddy". (I would never say it!)

[vgqn.livejournal.com]

Well, that certainly doesn't qualify as a euphemism!

FWB

[markiv1111.livejournal.com]

I started hearing the term (I can't quite say "on an ongoing basis," when the topic doesn't come up that often) in the last four or five years. Having been born in 1949, I was well past 50 when this came up, and in a stable marital relationship, so it's not likely to come up where I'm concerned. I don't see it as being euphemistic, by the way -- just a nice honest way of saying it that won't make most people wince.

Nate

Re: FWB

[vgqn.livejournal.com]

The first time I heard it was in a context where it wasn't apparent, and I wondered what 'benefits' meant. Someone with a great car? A friend with a generous employer (like getting free food at a restaurant)? A friend who offers occasional crash space, a key to the apartment, help yourself to food in the refrigerator? I could think of all sort of possible benefits other than sexual. So yes, I'd call it a euphemism.

Re: FWB

[nancymcc.livejournal.com]

I think the idea is that everyone has their mind in the gutter, so the first benefits that would occur to them would be....

[pameladean]

I'm over fifty, and I've heard it. I have to say, its application to bonobos cracks me the hell up, though. *snrch*

P.

[vgqn.livejournal.com]

Indeed, that was my first response!

[barondave.livejournal.com]

"Friends with benefits" is, like, the bees knees. I love my wife but oh you kid!

[fishbliss.livejournal.com]

Is there a Federal Registry somewhere of FwB?

[cakmpls.livejournal.com]

I have teen and young adult kids, but I first heard it elsewhere, though I can't remember where. I'm 60.

[wild-patience.livejournal.com]

I think I first heard it on an episode of "Friends" years ago.

[headgardener.livejournal.com]

Not one I'd previously heard in the UK -- but may well now start to percolate round these shores. Definitely a polite euphemism -- ie, a phrase that could be used to parents. Or may its just that I'm the wrong side of the age hump.